This week’s guest blog is co-written by Lindsay Bolt and Akinjide Famoyegun, our leaders from both Friday’s hill workout and Sunday’s PRIDE Parade. Lindsay and Jide have been long time members of the NPSF tribe and we couldn’t have had more fun this weekend marching (and dancing) beside them. Thank you both for all your hard work and putting so much time into making this a memorable weekend for so many!
I’m proud of you
It started as a question: “Hey Lindsay, wouldn’t it be funny if we got NP a spot at the Pride parade?”. Over breakfast several months ago Lindsay and I discussed among other things, our tribe’s queer membership. As welcoming as NPSF had been to us, we couldn’t help but notice our queer community not represented as prevalently as we hoped in the tribe. This is San Francisco after all, one of the gayest cities in the world. Gays love free fitness too.
The question lingered and ideas took off. Lindsay frantically searched for registration information and had a form filled out before I could finish my coffee. At the end of that meal November Project San Francisco officially applied to the 47th Annual San Francisco Pride Parade. “Let’s gay it up,” Lindsay declared.
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This week while making rainbow shirts for the tribe, our co-leader Laura asked us how we came out to our families. For Jide, it was a process over the course of his 20s. He initially told a few close friends and then his brother and then his parents, separated by a few years. It really wasn’t a one time thing – we don’t all get to have our People Magazine coming out moment where everyone in our lives, present and future, gets the memo. For me, it was unusual because it was a non-event – my pops stole my thunder. I told him that I was dating the new hockey skating teacher (a woman). He, without missing a beat, told me that he and my mother had figured it all out long before I did. “There were a lot of Ani Difranco concerts. You took me to gay pride in Cape Cod” he reminded me. There was a lot going on at the time – my mom had died the year before and she was the glue for us – we were a bit lost as a family. Me being gay was the least of our problems. For my family, ‘coming out’ last year as childless by choice ended up being a much bigger disappointment. Seriously though, I was really lucky because for nearly everyone around me, coming out was upending their relationships with friends and family.
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As Pride approached Lindsay and I began having more discussions on the importance of this celebration. We recognize that at the core of this tribe is its willingness to be a part of the larger community beyond itself. We wanted NP to show up for the LGBTQ community. Through the small gesture of crowdfunding the parade contingent in less than a week, NP showed up.
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My girlfriend and I spent perhaps three hours this week talking about the awesome blog post from NP Baltimore member @halliferz and about how Gay Pride has evolved and how it has evolved for us as queers. Having grown up in SF, she is a big fan of the inclusivity that has come in recent years – allies are everywhere! On the other hand, I had always felt most comfortable in queer social spaces and for the first time, with NP, I felt safe and welcomed in a totally different crowd. Being inclusive cuts both ways – as much as I wanted queers to be included in the larger world community, I also had to let people into my world and expand my own comfort zone.
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So what does Pride mean to me? It means being unapologetic about living your truth. It means leading a bounce on a Friday workout and hearing your peers scream yas kween! when you greet them good morning. It means hijacking a Friday Hills history lesson to talk about the brave folks that came out (swinging) long before we did. It means sharing a San Francisco tradition with your tribe members, many of whom are experiencing a Pride celebration for the first time. Somehow this plan worked out and we tricked a largely straight group to join us at this big gay party. And for that we couldn’t be more proud.
Thank you November Project for your acceptance and trust in this experience. We couldn’t love you any more.
Step one : wakeup. So hard. Even when you are excited.
Step two: arrive and check it out. Note weather conditions and neighbors already in park. Gauge their willingness to play.
Step three: channel MKE and Clayton and post a wake up video
Step 4: mess with a Spotify mix and maybe converse with Karl. Like talking out loud to the fog. Might need to look at getting more sleep.
Step five: run a safety check lap and greet the folks already here at 0545am 😳 try to figure out if they are NP or not. Ah, yes. Not.
Step 6: get so excited when the sun makes a stop by. #instagang
Step 7: have that momentary – will it just be me and Jide? Then remember the rungang solves that problem every week! Hi rungang! Hi Mrs Karen. (Did I get it right Max?)
Step 8: greet the shit out of the tribe. Overwhelm them with rainbow goodness. Get hyped.
Step 9: realize that getting people to gather together is actually tough for the leaders. Noted.
Step 10: greet the newbies. Help Bolt get the names right. Hi Dick!!
Step 11: greet the traverbalers. Remind folks returning HOME that they are not really a traverbal and we are so happy they are here. Tell them they are looking good (because they are)
Step 12: bounce. Give it some pride. kween with a KW friends. It is everything. A ok? Nope. GAY OK. That’s right.
Step 13: actually workout. Run so folks follow you. That is why we are here. Many will forget this part.
Step 14: picture! Lots of blue = sept/October babies like NP. scorpios and libras and virgos
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