Heather Millar is not the first badass pregnant woman to train at November Project, but she’s one of the currently inspiring and fiercely badass women who not only works her ass off at every workout, but is creating a brand new little human being who will very soon pop out yelling “fuck yeah” when asked “are you good?” She’s also already a mom and finds a way to balance out being a mom and a family member, and also training for life like a boss. She reminds us how important each and every one of us are as members of this tribe. Look around. See each other. It really makes a difference. We couldn’t do this thing called NP with out you, or without this badass chick, Heather. But read on, we’ll let her tell her own story.
So, quite a while ago, now, you invited me to write a guest blog for November Project Boston. I did not give any prompt response, but I’ve been trying to write this in my head ever since. I wanted to find the perfect words, the right angle, and make it really good; like better than I had time to create on any given normal day. I delayed, made excuses, and watched my chance to add my voice to the community I have come to love and depend on begin to slip past. This week in particular has been a long and hard one, and one of the reasons I’ve really struggled to come through it with any grace is that I haven’t been to an NP workout since PR day at the stadium last week. Three (count them, I have been counting them…) workouts have passed that I didn’t make it to for one reason or another and the #FIMO is smoldering into something darker.
You see, since first coming to NP in July of 2015 I have become dependent on all of you. The community extends beyond the workouts, but is peak and unspeakably beautiful whenever I do manage to show up for a workout. I love to feel so welcomed by unfamiliar faces (but very often becoming more familiar week by week) as well as connect with the friends that I’ve made. I could gush endlessly about how amazing I think you all are. I love the bounce (even though being on my third pregnancy and into the third trimester now it totally makes me pee a little sometimes #TMI #sorrynotsorry). I absolutely love shouting FUCK YEAH early in the morning and realizing that I mean it. And even beyond all of this I love the work. Whether it’s a deck, or the stadium, or that ridiculous fucking hill on Summit I love what these challenges bring out in me and all of the ways that I grow with every gain and even with every setback in reaching the goals that I set for myself. I have tried things and accomplished things that I never would have imagined I could do. I have watched other tribe members make amazing accomplishments and been inspired on so many levels.
When I come to November Project I feel that I am Seen. Let me say that again: When I come to November Project I feel that I am Seen. I am accepted immediately as a tribe member and I am valued. How often in my daily life as a mother, as a waitress, and as woman am I made to feel invisible, or less-than? At NP we begin with the sheer triumph of Just Showing Up, and the celebrations only continue from there. We witness one another and encouragement flows freely. We are all lifted up by the positivity of the culture. Why else do you think I’m still dragging my swollen, super-pregnant ass up and down stadium steps and punishing inclines (and ripping out some modestly modified burpees)? Because you all make it worth it; you make me feel that I am worth it. Even more than the bolstering effect of all the love and praise I get when I show up and do my part there is the satisfaction of holding myself to the work and having goals. I am training for life. I am training for a more peaceful center and a fiercer stride. I am training for my upcoming (third and decidedly final) labor and delivery. And no one should be surprised to imagine that I plan to lead in to that challenge with a FUCK YEAH followed by a ridiculously impossible workout which I will not think I can do, but which I will have to just fucking do. In the end I will hold my daughter and I will tell her, “I’m so glad you’re here,” and I will know that you will all share my joy and welcome her into the tribe just as you have welcomed me and my two sons. I’m so glad you all are here.
I couldn’t do this without you.
With Love,
Heather Millar
MONDAY DESTINATION DECK
We will #JustShowUp Monday at Powderhouse Square in Somerville. Verbal & exact location here
“SHOWING UP” Film Premiere (BOSTON):
We’re hosting the Boston Premiere of Dooster’s original ‘SHOWING UP’ on November 19th at 6:30 PM. That’s not a typo. It’s 6:30 PM. Night. Evening. Not Morning. The starting location is here. More details dropping next week. Save the date and the entire rest of the night. That’s all you need to know.
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