I hadn’t been to November Project in a few weeks. The first workout I missed because I was busy, or I overslept, or some other mundane excuse that no one wants to hear. But to tell the truth, all the subsequent workouts I missed were because I was scared. Let me explain.
I’ve never considered myself an athlete. I stayed pretty active as a kid, but through my middle and high school years 10 times out of 10 you’d be more likely to find me rehearsing for the school play than running on the track. Given that background, I think it surprises a lot of people when they hear I’ve joined a fitness group that prides itself on doing seriously hardcore workouts at too-early o’clock, even in extreme weather conditions.
And yet, on a sub-zero Friday morning last December I finally plucked up the courage to run up and down hills with the hooligans that I now call friends, and I’m so glad I did. At a time in my life when I was desperately struggling to connect with others the NP family welcomed me with open arms; and even though most days I’m running just to get to the coffee on the other side, NP workouts are still kicking my sedentary lifestyle to the curb.
But still, I often find myself fighting that little voice of negativity in my head. The one that’s telling me I’ll never really be a runner, that I have no business hanging out with these seasoned athletes, that I should definitely just give up now. I let that voice win for the past few weeks, and when my alarm would go off on Wednesday and Friday mornings I let it tell me to roll over and go back to sleep.
Until today! Today I just showed up anyway, even though I was dreading that workout, (which, unsurprisingly, was kind of a beast). But instead of listening to the voice telling me I’d made a huge mistake in coming back, I reminded myself of a few truths as I huffed and puffed my way through:
No one else cares how slowly I’m going.
It’s okay that I still walk the majority of workouts, as long as I’m trying my best.
It really doesn’t matter that everyone and their mother (sometimes literally) is lapping me.
I am the only one who thinks that I am not good enough to be here.
The more I thought about it, the more I don’t think I’m alone in having to remind myself of these things. I suspect many people think they aren’t fast enough, strong enough, good enough for NP. Maybe it’s holding them back from trying an an NP workout at all. So this goes out to anyone who’s been putting off coming to a workout, whether it’s your first one or, like me, you’ve taken a hiatus and are scared to come back.
Just show up. It’s simple, and yet I know how difficult it can feel. But if you follow through and come to a workout I promise that I’ll run/walk/crawl with you the whole way. And I promise that whether you’re lapping me or I’m lapping you it doesn’t matter, I’ll be cheering you on all the same. Because my favorite part about November Project, (even though I sometimes struggle to believe it) is that everyone is good enough to be a part of it.
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YAY!!! You are an inspiration AND an athlete!