I have something to admit to you, dear friend. When you verbaled for NP last night, I was slightly disappointed. Our workouts are incredibly fun, high energy and very competitive. And well, you’re just kind of mediocre.
Each member of the tribe brings something different to the group. They all add their own personal flare to make this such a diverse, interesting collection of humans. But you? Eh. You bring very little to the table. Sometimes we make small talk about the Bay Bridge, but I have nothing left to say on the subject. Yes, I too wish we could bike over it.
This morning, as I looked around the tribe, I could see the looks of elation on their faces when they realized you broke your verbal. Now we could resume our workout with the highest level of excellence knowing you weren’t there to bring down the group average.
If in the future you toss and turn about whether or not you should #justshowup to a November Project workout, don’t you worry your tiny, little brain. Get that extra sleep. Rest knowing that the tribe is doing wonderfully without you there, and that showing up would most definitely dimmer, if not completely kill, the vibe.
And if you’re dying to get involved in this world takeover, maybe you should check out NP NYC. I hear they have a tribe FULL of unexceptional and completely forgettable people you would fit right in with.
With lackluster love,