“You can’t fuck this up.”
Pardon my language, but that is the phrase that stuck with me the entire day. “Take a deep breath, you can’t fuck this up.”
LA said that as she took me through some of the first yoga I had done in months. The sun was rising, the clouds were perfect and I was standing in a city I love, with people I love, doing yoga on asphalt. The whole thing was unique and spectacular and unbelievably memorable. But as I struggled to get into something that resembled a boat pose, it was that phrase that stuck with me most.
Now you go to work. You’ve got reports to write, clients to meet with, IV’s to insert and students to teach. That life can be stressful, it can wear you down because yes, you CAN fuck that up. People are relying on you and you don’t want to let them down. This is your life we’re talking about and there’s a lot of pressure not to mess things up. That pressure builds and builds until one day you can’t even remember what you were doing there in the first place.
Sometimes we need to do some things that you simply “cannot fuck up.” As human beings we are programmed to think there is a right and wrong way for everything. A right way to look, a right way to laugh, a right way to run, a right way to eat. It’s so seldom that someone brings us a gift, a gift like this morning, and just tells you to be yourself because there is simply no way you can break it. All you have to do is exist and enjoy that moment.
There is a time to be nervous about screwing up. But we must be careful to make sure that our lives are not consumed by those moments or people who put too much pressure on us to never “fuck up.” Saying goodbye to my good friend Wookie was a reminder of that. I met Wookie as I am, dressed in short shorts, loud colors, relentlessly screaming profanity. Good people come along, just like Wookie, and pretty much tell you what LA said, ” We’re gonna be friends man, I see you how you are…you can’t fuck this up.” Don’t worry about who you need to be, just be who you are. The tribe is going to miss that when he leaves this weekend.
Shaun, today’s positivity award winner, is another reminder of this idea. We grilled Shaun a little bit today when we handed him the award. He first showed up with headphones in, slightly cocky, and none of us knew what to make of him. But in a space like November Project where all of that pressure to be first is off, Shaun turned into one of our most hardcore members. He got faster, he got stronger and soon we all realized what a kind, motivated individual he was, always willing to put himself on the line for new friends. It takes a safe space to bring that out of people, but now that I see Shaun so clearly, I can never see him any other way.
It’s a small, “profane” phrase but I wish we would say it more often. I wish people could reach out to one another and remind our fellow human beings that having the best proverbial boat pose doesn’t always matter. No one cares whether you’re fast or slow, new or old, the right color, the right religion, the right shape. If more of us could simply reach out to one another and say, in some way, “you can’t fuck this up, I’ll take you as you are.” the world would be a much better place. Some things are just better left imperfect. Sometimes all you need to do is #justshowup.
Much love to LA for teaching an amazing 6:00 am Yoga class full of tiny life lessons. You’re NP_BAL to the core.
As always, Take Big Bites Out of Life.
Share via socials: