Hutch Dethroned, King Macdonald Declared (SF)

This morning, as the fog cleared over Alta Plaza park and the sun rose over the horizon, a new King was born. Actually, he was born about 25 years ago, but I like to think this is the defining moment of his life, the one he will tell his grandkids about, the day he refers to as the all-time best. This was the day Iain Macdonald became King.

Best part? Hutch was too nervous to show his face and throw down*. He saw the social media stir, realized the streets would be lined with spectators to watch his beautiful body move through space, like an eagle cutting effortlessly through the air with no resistance. He knew the city would be chanting his name, “HUTCH”, “HUTCH”, “HUTCH.” These thoughts tormented his dreams and he couldn’t muster up the strength to get to Alta Plaza this morning, leaving the door open for King Macdonald to burpee roll his way through.

The image of victory is that of Iain gliding up the final set of stairs, barely panting, glistening with sweat, and staring Paddy O’leary down as if to say, “You’re my bitch.”

Next month we will highlight the Queens of the tribe, but I ran out of descriptive/slightly offensive things to say for one blog.

*Hutch is actually injured. Or at a work meeting? Injured at a meeting.

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