Dear Sarah Mahogany Buzogany,
Today, at 4:45am, my alarm woke me up. I was not ready to wake and face the brutality of my heatless house, but alas, Twin Day was upon us. You see, Sarah and myself have become known as the twins of the NP_BAL tribe. We are not blood related; however, we have very similar looks such as hot bods, tall giraffe height, what used to blonde hair but is now brownish because we are no longer in diapers, and the signature sexy specs that rest on our faces as we look out into the world. People get us mixed up!
So, this cold, dark morning, Sarah and I decided TODAY was going to be our Twin Day. I would go to the 5:30am workout and stay for 6:30am so we could confuse the hell out of everyone with our Twinning-ness. We planned our outfits telepathically of course, but just to make sure, went sent some text messages back and forth.
As you can see, the texting game was strong and twinny. Our leaders gave us a tough workout when your name is Mia Annette Edelhauser (see blog post for further details of the workout). I was sweating like a hard core ninja on skates at 1:38pm on a hot summer day. At times, I wish I didn’t have my glasses on, because they were fogging up like a mad dog. I tried to hold out as long as I could, for I know Twin Sarah would also be in glasses. But I ended up taking my glasses off, going blind. The first workout ended and without my glasses,and I had not spotted Twin Sarah yet. I thought to myself “Twin Mia, you can’t find Twin Sarah because you need to be a 4-eyed creature.”
So I did what any twin would do, I grabbed the foggy lenses and bestowed them upon my face. With my eagle vision, I began to scan the crowd for a familiar face, literally, because we are twins. I searched high and…wait just high, because we are tall twins after all, AND TWIN SARAH MAHOGANY BUZOGANY WAS NOT IN SIGHT!
As the bounce begun I sprung into the air to see if I could find her… but I could only see non-twinning people. I activated my twin mind powers and shouted Twin Sarah’s name throughout the air with my mind, but I only heard silence and Nick Rod chanting about armpits. My thoughts were racing: “Was Twin Day 2016 going to be a normal day? Am I not going to be able to switch names and do the Sarah Mahogany Buzogany workout while she does the Mia Annette Edelhauser?”
As time went on, it revealed that Twin Day was, in fact, not going to happen. Twin Sarah decided her bed was warmer, and did not just show up.
Sarah, did you get confused? I know that MY name is MIA but that doesn’t mean on “Twin Day” you get to be M.I.A.
All the love,
Mia and the tribe